Oh good Nintendo managed to make the Game Boy bigger. 1080p system? About 5 years behind aren't we fellas?
A love letter to Nintendo wrote:
NOBODY GIVES A FUCKING SHIT ABOUT THE CONTROLLER!
All my love,
Gamers at large
Jesus Christ. Nintendo's strategy seems to be implement some new peripheral to distract you from noticing they don't put out decent games. Ever see The Jerk
? Remember when Navin Johnson (Steve Martin) rigs up that guy's glasses so they don't fall off and then later on the guy markets it and Navin becomes rich? If you haven't seen it (I suggest you do, it's hysterical) it turned out that there was a design flaw that makes everyone's eyes concentrate on the Opti-Grab
so they go cross eyed. This is how I see the Wii-U controller. Everyone will be herp derping while playing the "new" Zelda game. "Do I concentrate on the screen or the controller? The screen! No the controller! The screen! FUCK!" What happens when you drop that big bulky mess? Screen cracks, time to spend another $100? (maybe at the barest of all minimums) $200? $300? It can't be cheap with that screen plopped right in the middle of it. So now you're waving this big white plastic thing in the air, your grip slips and you knock out grandma who enjoyed the Wii at her nursing home, putting her in a coma indefinitely. Although this may never occur considering you'll probably have to charge that thing every hour because of that fucking screen draining power faster than a toaster in a bath tub.
Please Nintendo for all that is good in the world stop "revolutionizing" how games are played and just put out the same tired titles you've been putting out for the past 26 years. (Seems like enough of you retards are already excited about the lastest installment of Mario Part- err... I mean Smash Bros.) You'll still make boat loads of money and the majority gaming community will respect you for it. The minority (read intelligent) having already jumped shipped midway through the N64 life span. For some reason you're into creating gimmicks rather than contracting decent software developers. Gimmicks don't last and neither will you. Nintendo, you're a dinosaur become extinct if you plan to continue with this dog shit.